


iNever Knew This Would Be So Hard

by dinosgirl3



Category: iCarly
Genre: Angst, Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2009-05-20
Updated: 2010-10-07
Packaged: 2013-08-25 05:34:23
Rating: M
Chapters: 4
Words: 16,585
Publisher: www.fanfiction.net
Story URL: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5075276/1/
Author URL: http://www.fanfiction.net/u/1904346/dinosgirl3
Summary: It’s been three months since Freddie and Carly lost their innocence to one another. How will they deal with the repercussions? One moment changed everything - friendships, families, relationships - and they are learning it’s a long hard road to fix it...





	1. Prologue

**DISCLAIMER:** I do not own _iCarly_. The storyline and any original characters are a figment of my own imagination. Any similarities of original characters, places, or situations to any person or persons, places, or situations real or fictional, are purely coincidental.

**A/N:** This story takes place about three months following the events of _iNever Knew_. You don't really have to read that story to understand this one, but it _is_ a companion piece.

**STORY RATING:** M—strong language, angst, adult/sexual situations, depictions of sexual acts. This story is intended for mature audiences.

* * *

**PROLOGUE**

_Two Months Earlier…_

_With much reluctance, the young teenage beauty slid her hands from the back of the neck down to the chest of the boy she was in the midst of making out with, and gave him a firm push. When his lips separated from hers, she sighed. "We should really stop now." Her breathing was shallow and uneven._

"_Why?" he asked, again trying to pull her close and capture her lips with his own._

_She almost allowed herself to once more melt against him, but rational thought was winning out over desire. Deftly sliding her hand in between their faces, his lips instead found and grazed her palm. "Freddie," she said in an admonishing tone, "Sam'll be here any minute."_

_Reluctantly Fredward Benson pushed himself off of the girl and into a sitting position. "When are we gonna tell her, Carly?" As he sat back into the colorful bean bag in the_ iCarly _studio, he readjusted his clothing, re-buttoning and re-zipping everything she had so expertly taken her time undoing._

_Carly Shay ran a nervous hand through her disheveled hair, attempting to smooth it. "I told you—not just yet." Reaching under her shirt, she found the clasps of her bra and hooked them back together._

_This was an argument they'd had several times in the past few weeks. Ever since their relationship had changed a month ago, the night they had given their innocence to one another, Freddie had been anxious to tell everyone that they were dating and in a relationship. Carly, on the other hand, was reluctant to do so because she really wasn't sure just_ what _they were doing right now. They were definitely having fun fooling around, but she really wasn't sure she thought they were boyfriend and girlfriend. More specifically, she wasn't sure she was ready to commit to being in a serious relationship like that with Freddie. Yes she had feelings for him, strong ones, but truth be told—they scared the hell out of her._

"_Well when?" he asked, becoming agitated._

_She watched as he stood up and began getting the equipment ready for the _iCarly_ show that night. She saw how his movements were jerky and the way his jaw clenched. "Don't get mad," she sidled up behind him and wound her arms around his waist. She felt him stiffen. "I'm just not ready yet," she said as she kissed him lightly on the back of his neck, then again. She could feel the muscles in his back beginning to relax._

_He sighed. "I don't get what the big deal is." He turned to her, avoiding her gaze. "Are you…" he paused, almost afraid if he asked the question he would get confirmation of what he feared, "Are you ashamed of me—of what we did?" He brought his eyes to hers uncertainly. He wanted to add that they had not yet slept together again since that first night even though he thought they would have by now; he was worried she regretted it._

"_Oh, Freddie, no. No, that's not it at all. It's just," she took his hand in hers and idly began toying with his fingers, not wanting to make eye contact, "I'm afraid, okay." She was reluctant to admit it, but she was terrified that making it official would mean that if something were to happen to break them up, not only would they no longer be together as boyfriend and girlfriend, but their entire friendship would become irreparable, resulting in him getting hurt—and, as selfish as it seemed, her getting hurt as well._

"_Afraid of what? That Sam won't approve?"_

"_No," she said, dropping his hand as she turned awa,y drifting over to start setting up the props for the show. "Just forget it." She knew he would just think her reasoning was stupid and irrational. To him, his feelings for her were simply black and white. Hers, in contrast, were clouded in a shade of gray._

_Freddie followed her and whirled her around. "Uh-uh. Tell me, Carly—what_ are _you afraid of then?"_

"_I said forget it."_

_They heard the elevator rattle as it arrived on the floor. "You want to forget it? Fine—it's forgotten," Freddie said ominously, still holding her arm. He continued to hold it a second longer than necessary before he finally let go and went back to his tech cart to prepare for the show._

_Carly opened her mouth to ask just what he meant when the elevator doors slid open, and Samantha Puckett entered the studio, a half-eaten roast beef sandwich in her hand. "What's up, guys?" she greeted, her mouth full of bread and deli meat._

_When Freddie didn't answer, Carly quickly composed herself and gave Sam a falsely bright smile. "Hey, Sam! We're just getting everything ready."_

"_Sorry I'm late. My mom stopped me on the way out screaming something about my Uncle Frank going back to the slammer," she paused and waited for Freddie to make his usual remarks about her and her family's considerable jail records. When he remained silent and continued to fool with his laptop, Sam sneered. "What—no comments from the peanut gallery?" She turned back to Carly and jerked a finger in Freddie's direction. "What's Fredweird's problem?" She took another large bite of her sandwich._

_Carly feigned ignorance and shrugged as she pulled out two extremely large, floppy hats from the costume trunk. They were to be used in one of the skits they were going to perform. "Just leave him alone, Sam."_

_Sensing some tension in the room, Sam decided not to push. "Whatever." She crammed the last of her sandwich into her mouth. Rubbing her hands against one another, she brushed the crumbs from her fingers. "Let's get this show started."_

"_All right, ladies," Freddie said, finally speaking. "Or should I say, lady and Sam." His voice was laced with sarcasm. Sam narrowed her eyes and made a face at him. "We're live in five…four…three…two…"_

_Later, after the show had wrapped up, Freddie took down the equipment in record time and attempted to bid a hasty retreat. Carly managed to catch up with him on his way out while Sam was otherwise occupied trying to convince Spencer to make a pot of chili. _

"_Hey," she said following him into the hallway. He ignored her. "Hey!" she repeated, this time a bit louder and grabbing at the back of his shirt._

_He spun around on her, clutching his laptop in his hands. "What?" The look he gave her was not a friendly one._

"_Can't we talk about this?" she pleaded desperately._

"_You said to forget it. It's forgotten."_

"_That's not what I meant, Freddie—"_

_He cut her off. "I think it's pretty clear what you meant. That what happened between us was a mistake."_

_Her breath caught in her throat. "Don't say that." She could feel the tears fill her eyes, burning hot and threatening to fall._

_He wanted to soften, to kiss away the single tear that managed to slip down her cheek. But in his mind, the proof was there. "Admit it, Carly. We haven't slept together since that night. And anytime I bring up telling Sam or Spencer or someone about us, you get all weird and close up." He shrugged and started backing away, trying to keep it together when really his insides were twisting and revolting with hurt and sadness. "You tell me how I'm supposed to believe it's all okay and that what we're doing is going to lead anywhere. How it's right." He swallowed his pride and put it all on the line. "I love you, Carly. Can you say the same?"_

_Carly wanted so badly to answer him, but her mouth wouldn't form the words. In a split second, her world came crashing down around her. She reached for him._

"_That's what I thought," Freddie said, jerking out of reach. He was afraid if she touched him he would lose what little control he had left over his emotions. Instead, he turned his back on her, but not before giving her one last forlorn look. She felt her heart drop and wondered just what she had done…_

_

* * *

_

**END NOTES:** Don't worry—this _is_ a Creddie story although it may not seem like it at the moment—I _**promise**_! I just feel like this story needs a bit of angst and tension to get off to a good start and to help develop the plot as the story progresses. I hope the Prologue doesn't discourage anyone from reading further...

*listens for crickets chirping*

Also—I would like to give a special thanks to _The Burning Red Rose_ for her help. :)


	2. Chapter One

**A/N:** I do apologize for the length of time it took me to get this up. I hope you still enjoy it though! Feel free to yell and scream at me—it's warranted. I sometimes need someone to crack the whip at me to keep me on track...

* * *

**CHAPTER ONE**

It was Friday morning, and Carly watched the couple from across the hallway. As she removed each book from her heavy pack, she slammed it down into her locker with a _BANG!_ She used such force the metallic echo of the lock could be heard rattling furiously. Red hot jealousy boiled in her veins. They were so cute and sweet—he had his head bent close to hers, laughing over something he was showing her on his phone. Grumbling to herself, she was overwhelmingly reminded that she too could have had that, but no. Her own stupid insecurities had gotten in the way. She again reached into her bag. English Lit? _BANG!_ Algebra II? _BANG!_

"You trying to kill a bug in there or something?"

She jumped at the sound of the voice behind her. Clutching her backpack to her chest, Carly spun around. "Jesus, Sam. You nearly gave me a heart attack."

"Sorry." Sam shrugged and gestured with a nod toward Carly's open locker. "Why are you being so mean to your school books? Usually I'm the one who has a beef with them." Dropping her pack from her shoulder, she reached up to dial the combination on her own locker.

"It's nothing," Carly mumbled while her gaze unconsciously wandered back to the couple. He had put his phone away and was now casually draping an arm over the girl's shoulder. She watched as the girl leaned in and kissed him on the cheek. He beamed with pride. "Ugh," Carly said with disgust, her hands clutching her bag so tightly her knuckles turned white.

Sam craned her neck to look over Carly's shoulder. "Ugh is right. Seriously, Carls." She turned her attention back to opening her locker. "Why that poor girl is dating Fred-dork is beyond me."

_That's right_, Carly said to herself, _Freddie is dating _her_ instead of _you_. You had your chance and you blew it._ She stared daggers at the petite brunette with her soft, brown curls, pale blue eyes and dimpled cheeks. There was no denying it, Gretchen Shauer was adorable. She had transferred a month and a half ago from a small town in northern California, where, naturally, she had headed the AV Club at her school. Freddie had taken to her immediately, leaving Carly alone and seething with undue abhorrence for the girl. "I couldn't tell you," she said, struggling to act unaffected.

When Freddie leaned in to kiss Gretchen softly on the mouth, Carly tore her eyes away as her stomach knotted in resentment, leaving the bitter taste of bile burning in her throat. "Oh get a room," she said to no one in particular, slamming her locker shut.

Sam gave Carly a funny look. Normally she would be the one getting all grossed out by Freddie making out with his girlfriend in the hallways. The fleeting memory she had of how soft his lips had once been on hers was brief and insignificant. "If I didn't know any better, I'd say you sound a bit jealous there, Cupcake," Sam said swinging her locker shut as well.

Carly feigned a scoff and began heading in the direction of her and Sam's science class. "No—I'm just worried he'll start neglecting _iCarly_ the deeper he gets involved with her. Plus, after that one incident with Valerie…"

Sam shrugged. "Maybe, but he's been really good about it so far. Minus the fact he _does_ bring her to nearly every rehearsal and show."

Carly rolled her eyes. "I _know!_" And then realizing how mean she was beginning to sound, she relented. "It could be worse, I guess—she is really nice. And she _does_ stay out of the way," she said on a sigh.

"Hey guys—wait up!"

Carly and Sam turned to find Freddie running to catch up and walk with them to class. "I see Fredweird has decided to grace us with his presence," Sam said, lifting her brows in insolence.

"I'm in such a good mood even your complete disregard for basic human politeness can't get to me, Sam," Freddie said with a smile. Sam rolled her eyes. He turned to Carly. "Hey, Carly," he said, his good mood dampening only slightly when he noted the way Carly didn't quite meet his gaze. He figured everything was behind them now, but couldn't help the small tug of desire he still felt when he was around her.

"Hi, Freddie," Carly replied, keeping her tone friendly. When he fell into step beside her, she could smell his familiar scent—fresh soap mixed with a very subtle, but very appealing cologne. She felt her blood stirring as she remembered how much more intense it was on the soft skin of his throat, right where his pulse beat a steady rhythm. She used to love to bury her face there. Then, when she would kiss and scrape her teeth along that spot, she would feel the rhythm change, increasing, becoming more erratic and then Freddie would…_No!_ she told herself. _Don't think about it_. "So, ummmm…how's Gretchen?" Not that she really cared, but she didn't want to let on how bothered she was just being near him. Big mistake—the smile that lit up Freddie's face tore her apart inside.

"She's good," Freddie said, emotions swirling inside of him—contentment at the thought of Gretchen's lips upon his moments ago, and guilt because his thoughts were also clouded with the memories of how much more satisfying Carly's kisses had been. "She came over for dinner last night. My mom thinks she's really sweet. She likes her a lot."

"Oh really? How nice." Carly had already known this. She wasn't about to admit it, but she'd been spying through the peephole and had watched as Gretchen arrived at the Benson's apartment across the hall. She'd also seen the long, lingering kiss Freddie had given her before putting his arm around her shoulders and leading her inside. She began to wonder just how far he had taken it with Gretchen…

Sam nudged Carly on the ribs. "Maybe now Psycho Mom will stop hounding you to date her precious Fredward," she said through a giggle.

"Huh? Oh yeah," Carly said, grateful when Freddie began his typical banter with Sam.

"My mom is not psycho. She's just…_concerned_," he said, unable to come up with anything better and also wanting Sam to steer the conversation away from his crush on Carly. _My_ former _crush_, he corrected himself.

"Freddie, she wanted me and Carly to throw away our underwire bras because she thinks they're dangerous."

He wished he hadn't, but he immediately _did_ have a mental image of Carly in her bra. Pushing it back out, he shook his head at Sam. "Maybe she's afraid it could snap and stab you or something."

Sam gave Freddie a rueful look. "My point exactly." She turned to Carly. "And how many death by bra stabbings have you heard of?" she asked sarcastically as the trio stopped just outside of their classroom door.

Carly gave Freddie an apologetic look. "To be honest—I haven't heard of any."

He gave her a quirky grin. "Sure—take her side," he joked and, for a moment, she felt as if everything was right again between them. Maybe they really could just be friends again. Right then and there she vowed to make it her mission.

No matter how hard it would be…

"So you guys want to come over tonight and watch a movie?" Carly asked. She cleared her throat. "You can…uh…you can bring Gretchen if you want," she said, looking at Freddie with what she hoped was a friendly smile. When he returned it, she relaxed and it became genuine.

Sensing she was truly trying to make an effort in mending their friendship, Freddie nodded. "Sounds good to me. I'm sure Gretchen would love it." He almost missed the way Carly's smile wavered slightly at the sound of his girlfriend's name, it was so quick. But it was there.

"I'm game," Sam said before turning to Freddie and flicking his forehead.

"Ow!" he exclaimed, his hand automatically reaching up to rub his stinging flesh. "What was that for?"

Sam shrugged and spun around to walk in the classroom. "What was what for?" she asked over her shoulder.

Freddie shook his head while dropping his hand to his side. "Does she have to come later?" he said, looking over at Carly.

She giggled. "C'mon, Freddie." She lifted her arm and placed her palm on his shoulder as they both watched Sam take her seat in class. "You know she lives to torture you."

He slid both his hands into his pockets, afraid he would give in to the sudden urge he had to turn into her and wrap his arms around her waist, pulling her in close. The warmth of her palm was seeping through the material of his shirt, stirring his blood. "Oh, I know it," he said, casually stepping to the side and forcing her to break the contact. "What time should we be there?"

Carly pulled her hand back, curling her fingers to her palm. His subtle brush-off was not lost on her. But she accepted it. Physical contact probably wasn't such a good idea. "Oh…uhhhh…seven'o'clock?" She began moving again, stepping through the classroom doorway.

Freddie followed. "We'll be there," he said as the bell rang, and they fell into their seats ready for class to begin.

*.*.*

"Spencer—I'm home!" Carly called as she opened the door to the Shay's apartment later that afternoon.

"Carly-O!" Spencer said, coming out of his bedroom. "Hey, Little Sis. You have a good day at school?"

She dumped her bag by the front door and made her way to the kitchen for a snack. "Yeah. Freddie and Sam are coming by later to watch a movie. You mind?"

Spencer shook his head questioningly and shrugged. "Do I have a choice?" he asked as Carly pulled a bowl of grapes from the fridge. She proceeded to throw one at him.

"Nope."

"Didn't think so." He joined Carly at the counter as she bit into a grape. Popping one of the sweet spheres into his own mouth, he gestured toward the bathroom. "By the way, Kate's here," he said, speaking of his girlfriend, Kate Morton. They'd been dating for the past two months.

"Oh, okay. You guys want to join us tonight?"

"Nah," Spencer said, hopping up and taking a seat on the counter. "I think we're gonna go out and catch a movie."

Carly smirked and nudged Spencer in the ribs. "Afraid if you stay here, you can't make out during the film?" She lifted her eyebrows for emphasis.

Before Spencer could respond, Kate came out of the bathroom and entered the kitchen. "Movies aren't any fun if you can't do a little—or a lot—of kissing during them," she said in a joking manner. "Hey, Carly."

Carly turned her attention to the pretty blonde with the cute bob and dark chocolate doe eyes. "Hey, Kate." She gave the older girl a warm smile. She actually was very pleased Spencer had found someone who seemed really nice, smart and funny. The fact that they also seemed to be pretty serious didn't bother her at all—in fact, it kind of excited her. She really wanted Spencer to find someone and settle down. Kate fit the bill perfectly. And from the way his eyes lit up the moment she entered the room—Carly knew Spencer agreed one-hundred percent. "Well, my friends and I wouldn't want to interrupt any 'romantic' moments you two want to share."

Kate slid her arms around Spencer's waist. "Your brother and I thank you." She lifted her lips and accepted Spencer's kiss. Carly watched with feelings of both happiness and envy. Happiness for Spencer that he seemed so content and settled. Envy on her part because Spencer and Kate had something she truly wanted—a loving relationship. No drama, no doubts, no questions. Just love and understanding. Carly chewed thoughtfully on a grape. Could she have had that with Freddie? Deciding it best not to dwell on it in light of her decision to make their friendship work, Carly wiped her hands on her skirt and cleared her throat. "Well I'm going to run to the video store and see what kind of movies they have for tonight."

Kate sat on one of the bar stools. She began twisting from side to side. "You want some company?"

"Nah. I won't be long."

"All right, Baby Sis—you got your phone on you if you need anything?" Spencer asked, hopping off the counter.

She held her Pear phone up for him to inspect. "Yep. Got it right here."

Satisfied, Spencer turned his attention to Kate. Suddenly he snapped his fingers. It was almost as if a light bulb had sparked on over his head. "Hey—you want to see who can spin the fastest?" he asked excitedly as he hopped up onto the other stool.

Kate's eyes lit up with enthusiasm. "Ummmmm…yeah!" she said in a mock sarcastic tone.

"On your mark…get set…_GO!_" Spencer yelled, and they frantically began swinging their arms and legs, causing the seats to spin erratically.

"Bye, guys," Carly called out as she opened the door. But they were too caught up in their race to even hear her. She rolled her eyes. "Fine—I see where I stand."

She watched as Spencer's chair spun him so fast he flew forward, landing on the floor with a thump. "I'm okay!" she heard him call against the floorboards.

"Oh, geez," Carly said to herself, closing the door and leaving her brother and his girlfriend to their antics.

*.*.*

It was six-thirty, and Carly was getting set-up for movie night. Spencer and Kate had left about twenty minutes ago and, in addition to the stack of DVDs already on the table, Carly had the popcorn made, the fruit kabobs assembled and the cocktail weenies wrapped in a buttery blanket of dough. She was getting ready to make a batch of fresh iced tea when she heard a knock on the door. Thinking it was Sam, she called out as she dragged a chair over to the counter. "Door's open!" she called over her shoulder, stepping up onto the chair.

Freddie entered to see Carly standing on a kitchen chair in front of an open cupboard. She was stretching her arm up high, her reach not quite seeming to contact its target. "What are you doing?" he asked, quickly making his way over to her.

Carly dropped her hand at the sound of his voice. She turned to look over her shoulder. "Hi, Freddie." She was getting ready to answer him, but it was then she noted he was alone. "Where's Gretchen?" she asked, somewhat glad Gretchen wasn't there, but also nervous now that it was just her and Freddie all alone in the apartment. She remembered how well that went over before. She prayed the always late Sam would hurry up and get there.

"Oh—she had something she needed to do with her mom." He watched as she again tried to reach something on the top self, but with no avail. "You need some help there?"

"Nah, I'm good," Carly said, happy to turn away from him and busy herself with the task at hand. He looked really nice in a navy and pale blue striped polo. She stretched her hand further, her fingertips barely grazing the handle of the pitcher she was trying to get. "Damnit!" she said, and hopped back off of the chair to exchange it for one of the taller bar stools.

Freddie made his way over. "Let me help," he said, attempting to take the stool from her hands, his fingers brushing up against hers.

She could have sworn she literally felt sparks fly. "What are you doing?" she asked, jumping back, clutching her hands tightly to her chest and sidestepping the stool, needing the physical barrier between them no matter how small.

He sighed; he too had felt the current that had passed between them. "I'm just trying to help. What are you trying to get anyway?"

When she was sure he was remaining where he was, she shoved the bar stool over to the cupboard and put the chair back at the table. "We broke the pitcher we usually use to make iced tea and I forgot to have Spencer get that other one up there," she pointed to a glass pitcher adorned with bright red watermelon slices, "down before he and Kate left." She placed a knee on the stool and attempted to stand. Since the seat swiveled three-hundred and sixty degrees, it was not an easy task. She finally managed to stand up unsteadily, keeping her knees bent deeply for stability.

Freddie knew he couldn't just stand and watch. "Well, here." He moved to her, grabbing the seat and holding it steady with one hand while offering the other to her. "Why don't you get down, and I'll get it for you. My reach is a little longer than yours."

Ignoring his hand, she tried reaching for it again, the chair wobbling slightly beneath her. She didn't dare attempt to straighten her legs for fear that if she did, she would come tumbling down.

"Stop being a pain, Carly. Let me help you."

Because she was quite freaked at the unsteadiness of the chair, she caved in. "Fine." She moved to climb off the chair on her own, still ignoring his hand—afraid if she took a hold of it, they would spontaneously combust. As she squatted further down, she misjudged her balance, and the chair spun out of Freddie's grasp. Carly lost her footing and plunged forward off of the stool. Freddie instinctively reached out to catch her. They both fell to the ground. She landed on top of Freddie, knocking the wind out of him.

"Oh my god, Freddie—are you okay?" Carly asked placing her hands on his cheeks. His eyes were closed, and when he didn't respond right away, she moved a hand on his shoulder and shook him. "Freddie?"

"I'm fine," he finally gasped. "Just had the wind knocked out of me." He opened his eyes to find Carly's face hovering above his, her palm still cupping his cheek. "_You_ okay?"

She nodded, her hair falling forward, forming a silky curtain around their faces. Once he caught his breath, he inhaled deeply, drawing in the fragrance of her fruity-scented shampoo and pineapple-coconut lip gloss. It was then he became all too aware of her soft breasts crushed against his chest, her slender hips pressed atop his own. He could feel her breath hot against his mouth. Any thought he had of Gretchen was fleeting. Right now his every sense was focused on Carly and how this _still_ felt so right.

She stared down at Freddie, noting the way his eyes suddenly darkened with desire. She could feel his heart rate increase, a cadence that matched the rising tempo of her own. She splayed her fingers on his face as she felt his hands cup around the back of her neck and delve into her hair, causing shivers to run up her spine. She dropped her head back on a sigh, exposing the white column of flesh covering her throat. Freddie lifted his head slightly, rubbing his lips ever so softly along her neck, not once pausing to kiss, just rubbing a continuous path, even as she lowered her face back down. He followed the curve of her jaw, the peak of her chin, the sculpted planes of her cheeks. Before she knew what she was doing, a murmur whispered through her lips, and with both hands, she grasped his face, guiding his wandering lips to her parted ones, pressing her hips more firmly into his. He groaned. She could feel the vibration of it against her chest, and the way his mouth, so close to hers, trembled as well. When his lips finally brushed feather-light against her own, the warmth that was building in her center spread like liquid flames. While she wanted him to kiss her, this teasing and tempting was much more erotic than anything she had ever experienced. Besides, on a barely conscious level, she knew if she allowed him to kiss her, she would be lost, vulnerable—once again opening herself to heartache.

With devastating patience, Freddie continued to barely touch his lips to hers. When it became almost too much to bear, he slipped his tongue out to taste the sweet and intoxicating flavor that was entirely Carly. He heard her whimper, and it went straight to his loins. Still not quite kissing, he skimmed one hand down her back, sliding it just under the hem of her shirt, resting his palm on the soft skin just above the waistband of her jeans. He felt goosebumps tickle the pads of his fingers as he traced lazy patterns on her silky flesh, his other hand busy tangling itself in her hair. He wanted so badly to crush his mouth against hers and take what his heart told him was his, but something held him back. As her tongue met his, he allowed himself a moment to revel in the extremely tantalizing sensation of their tongues swirling and stroking one another. "Carly." Her name escaped his lips before he could prevent it.

The instant he uttered her name, Carly was pulled back into reality. "Freddie, stop," she heard herself saying. She used her hands to push herself up and off of him slightly. They stared at one another, breaths coming out in shallow pants.

Finally, Freddie responded. "You're right." He began to sit up as she rolled off of his body and onto the ground. They were now sitting side by side on the kitchen floor. "I'm sorry, Carly."

"Don't be. It was just as much my fault as yours."

"What are we doing?"

"I don't know."

"That's part of the problem. You didn't know then, and you still don't know now." He got up and sat at the table, toying with one of the fruit kabobs lying on a plate in front of him.

"Freddie? I-I," she stammered as she stood up and joined him, "I wish this wasn't so complicated."

He gave her a sad look. "Me too."

"I promise I won't tell Gretchen."

Freddie groaned as guilt washed over him. He dropped his head into his hands. He had been so caught up in the moment, his girlfriend had completely slipped his mind. God, what a jerk he was! "Thanks," he said, looking back up and giving her a feeble smile.

Carly hesitated, but only briefly. "Just how far have the two of you gone anyway?" she couldn't resist asking.

His smile faded as quickly as it came. Freddie stood up and walked into the front room, shaking his head. He stopped in front of the couch and tuned back to her. "I don't see how it's really any of your business."

"You've slept with me and were just about to make out with me _on my kitchen floor,_ and it's none of my business what you are doing with another girl?" she said indignantly as she, too, rose from her seat, but remained standing where she was.

"She's my _girlfriend,_ and I'm not asking you anything about your love life, am I?" He didn't really know why he was getting so defensive. He could have just answered the question. Was it because then he would have to admit not only to Carly but to himself that he had no real desire to make things any more serious between him and Gretchen than they already were? That his heart still belonged to Carly?

"No—but it's not like I have one to speak of at them moment anyway." Carly felt her cheeks heat with embarrassment. It was another reminder of how he had found someone, and she was still sitting here alone and…_pining _for him? Nah. "Just so you know—I haven't slept with anyone since you."

"So that's what this is about—you want to know if I've slept with her yet?"

"No," Carly lied. When he crossed his arms across his chest and cocked his head at her with a wary look, she relented. "_Yes_…" she admitted, avoiding his gaze.

Because she looked so vulnerable, Freddie found himself reassuring her. "Well, I haven't."

Relief poured through Carly's veins. Why she cared so much, she didn't really know. It's not like she and Freddie were going to get together—were they? What just happened—it was probably only a misjudgment on both their parts, right? "O-o-ohhhh," she managed to stammer out awkwardly.

He stuck his hands in his pockets, avoiding her gaze. "Maybe coming over tonight wasn't such a good idea."

"I'm sorry, Freddie—please don't go." She began to move toward him, to reach for him, but instead dropped her hand uncertainly. "I shouldn't have asked that."

"Look—it's fine. I'm just not comfortable when it's just the two of us anymore, pretending to be friends."

A sudden feeling of dread washed over Carly. "What do you mean 'pretending'? We are friends I thought," she said, her voice wavering slightly with trepidation.

"I don't think I can do it, Carly. Acting like nothing ever happened between us." He shrugged. "Maybe it's not such a good idea for us to hang out anymore at all." He wanted to kick himself when he looked up to see a tear slip down her cheek. It angered him even more to know he put it there.

"That's a stupid idea," Carly argued.

"Look—I'll still help with _iCarly_ so you don't have to worry about that—"

"You think _iCarly_ is all I care about?" she interrupted, her body beginning to tremble with rage.

"No. I didn't mean it like that." As the tears began to fall in earnest, Freddie wrestled with both anger, and the need to comfort. "I just meant—"

Carly cut him off. "Stop it, Freddie—just _stop it!_ I care about you okay. _You!_" she said, her voice rising with emotion.

Freddie closed his eyes and counted to five, trying to pull it together. "Don't do this to me, Carly."

Wiping her cheeks with the backs of her hands, she glared at him. "Do what?"

"Get my hopes up." He sat down hard on the couch and dropped his head into his hands. He felt the cushions yield, indicating she had taken a seat beside him. He lifted his gaze to her. "I'm with Gretchen now. I shouldn't be feeling this way about you, but damned if I can help it." He wanted to reach out and wipe the smudged tear from her cheek with the pad of his thumb, but instead he clasped his hands tightly together. He knew if he touched her, he wouldn't be able to stop. "I'd better go," he said, getting up and walking to the door.

Carly wanted to follow after him, but thought the better of it. "Where does this leave us, Freddie?" she asked his retreating back.

"I don't know," he said without turning around. "I guess I'll see you at rehearsal on Monday." He stood there holding the door knob a brief moment before turning it and exiting the apartment.

* * *

**END NOTES:** Thanks guys. Reviews are _always_ appreciated! :)


	3. Chapter Two

**A/N:** Wow—thank you all so much for the kind and generous reviews! I had seriously just intended this story to be a little one-shot, a lemon if you will. I was itching to get out a random thought I'd had about how Freddie and Carly could end up in a romantic interlude—thus the birth of _iNever Knew_. I never really had any intentions of making it more than just that story and even that one I hadn't planned to make over fourteen-thousand words.

When I got the idea, I "Googled" _iCarly fanfic_ and got the link to ff (dot) net. I was expecting to see a bunch of "Creddie" stories. Imagine my surprise when the majority of them were "Seddie". I didn't realize there was such a fan base for that pairing—it seemed very odd to me. In my mind, they just didn't mesh well (I am seeing it a _little_ more now but still not quite a Seddie lover). So I kind of got into wanting to get my Creddie piece out there, not really expecting any feedback since it didn't appear there were many fans for that ship. Imagine my surprise when the reviews poured in—some even from Seddie fans. It was then I decided I needed to go on—explore Carly and Freddie's actions more, go deeper into the storyline. My mind started working overtime. And here we have it—_iNever_ _Knew This Would Be So Hard_.

Anyway—if you couldn't tell—I tend to get long-winded. My point is I really am dedicated to this story. I wish I had more time than RL allows me to update faster. I do appreciate all the feedback you have given me. I have had some real self-confidence boosting reviews out there and I sometimes don't feel deserving of them because I know I leave you waiting between updates. So without further ado—here is the Chapter Two. I hope you enjoy it. It took a little bit of a turn from where I had intended it to go, but I am satisfied with that. :)

Oh—and if you bothered to take the time to read all that—thanks! I ramble, I know. ;)

Okay—this time I am done, really…

* * *

**CHAPTER TWO**

"I'll take two Strawberry Splats and a basket of fries," Sam said, reaching into her pocket for the cash she'd "borrowed" from her mother's purse. It was Sunday afternoon, and she had brought Carly to the Groovy Smoothie in hopes of cheering her up—all weekend Carly had been acting like a zombie.

T-Bo, the regular cashier behind the counter, punched her order into the register. "You want some corn?" he asked, pulling a long wooden rod from beneath the counter. Ears of corn were skewered along the length of it.

"Dude—did you hear me say corn anywhere in there?" Sam replied. "Just give me my smoothies and fries."

As usual, T-Bo was persistent. "No, but are you sure—"

Sam cut him off. "I said, _du-ude!_" she repeated with a menacing look.

He opened his mouth to speak but immediately closed it, thinking it best. "That'll be eleven eighty-eight," he said instead.

Sam gave him a nod of approval. "Damn straight," she said, laying a ten and two ones on the counter.

He handed her her change. "I'll bring your order out in a few minutes."

"Thanks." Whirling around, she made her way over to the table where Carly was sitting. She noted the sad look in her friend's eyes. Turning on her brightest smile, she approached the table. "Carlotta," she teased, taking an adjacent seat, "mark this day on your calendar—I am actually treating _you_ to a smoothie!"

Carly looked up with a half-hearted grin. "Thanks, Sam," was all she could muster. This morning she had found the sweater Freddie thought he'd lost during one of their last times together. It had been pushed far under her bed amidst the random magazines and dust bunnies that usually resided there. She'd made the mistake of indulging in her urge to slip into it—it still smelled of him. Very faintly, but definitely there. It had made her realize how badly she'd screwed everything up. She'd been trying to protect their friendship, but in the end had lost him anyway. "This is really sweet of you." She forced some perk into her voice. It wasn't Sam's fault she was an idiot. She owed it to her to at least appreciate the effort Sam was putting forth.

Sam gave Carly a probing look. She knew something was bothering the brunette and, having noted Freddie's unusual absence the past couple of days, she figured it had something to do with him. Maybe the two of them had gotten into a fight. She wanted to ask, but figured Carly would tell her in due time. She always did. And—even though Sam would never admit it aloud—she kind of missed the dork. "Yeah well, don't get used to it."

This time Carly's smile and giggle were genuine. She knew she had been lousy company, but Sam had been a true friend, letting her brood and not asking questions. Maybe it was time she told Sam what had happened. "Look—I really want to apologize that I haven't been myself lately."

Sam shrugged. "Hey—I can tell something is bugging you, and I know sometimes you need to work through things on your own before you're ready to talk about them." She leaned over and bumped Carly's shoulder in a very Sam-like gesture of reassurance. "But remember—if you ever want to talk, I am here for you. You're my best friend, Carls. I hate seeing you so down."

"I know. It's just that...well what happened was…it's all kind of…" she stammered, not quite sure of where to begin—or even _how_ to begin. It was unlike anything her and Sam had ever really talked about before. Plus, she wasn't sure how Sam would feel about what had happened between her and Freddie. That she had _slept_ with him! She knew deep down Sam cared for Freddie, not in a romantic sense, or maybe even in a really friendly sense, but she cared for him, nonetheless. But Carly also knew it would probably weird Sam out. Not to mention Sam might get upset she hadn't said anything about it before. Having sex with someone was a pretty big deal. "Look, if I tell you, you have to promise me you won't get all freaked on me."

Thoroughly intrigued, Sam nodded enthusiastically. "I promise."

Carly opened her mouth to spill her secret when T-Bo, ever relentless and now ill-timed, appeared at their table. "Two Strawberry Splats and one basket of fries," he announced, setting the items down with a flourish. Even though his presence was no longer necessary, he remained rooted to the spot.

Sam waved him away with her hand. "You can go now buddy," she said quite rudely.

He still didn't move. "Now, are you two girls sure you don't want to order some co—"

Before he could even get the word "corn" out, Sam stood up, leaned in close to him and gave a scream that was somewhere between obnoxious and bloodcurdling. The toddler at the next table scrunched his eyes and covered his ears as the stunned employee spun on his heels and all but sprinted back to his place at the register.

Sam flipped a lock of her golden waves behind her shoulder and composed herself before sitting back down. She cleared her throat and smiled sweetly at Carly. "Sorry—you were saying?"

Carly gave an apologetic look to the teenage couple to the right of them before she looked back at Sam. "Well—I did something a few months ago, and now, looking back, I can't help but wonder if it was the right thing." She bit her lip and paused. She really didn't regret that she had given up her virginity to Freddie, more than anything, she regretted she hadn't been able to let herself feel for him the way he felt for her. All because she had been so stupid and scared… "And…and it involves someone else. Someone I care about. Someone who ended up hurt."

"Freddie?" Sam asked, putting the pieces together.

Carly immediately sat up straighter as her heart began pounding in her chest. Could Sam possibly already know? Would Freddie have confided in _Sam?_ "What? What have you heard? Did he tell you something happened?"

Noting the panic in Carly's voice, Sam took a long sip of her smoothie. "Relax, Carls. I've just noticed some tension between you two lately and assumed it had something to do with him." She selected an extra long fry from the basket. Popping it between her lips, she spoke with her mouth full. "Did you two have some kind of fight?"

Not quite placated, Carly shrugged. "I guess you could say that…"

Sam was beginning to get frustrated with Carly's vagueness. "Guess you could say _what?_ You're not making any sense here."

"I'm sorry—this is just a little…embarrassing to talk about."

"Carly, you can tell me anything."

"I know. Okay—so here's what happened—"

All of a sudden Sam leaned back into her chair and spoke. Loudly. "Gretchen…_Freddie_. Hi!"

Carly felt his presence behind her. Slowly she turned. He stood before her, holding Gretchen's hand. The petite girl flashed her adorable, dimpled smile. "Hi, Carly. Hi, Sam," she greeted.

"Oh—hey," Carly replied, trying to keep her cool. This had to be some kind of sign—twice she had been interrupted while trying to tell Sam what had happened. And now—by _Freddie_ of all people. Did this mean she was meant to keep this a secret forever? It sure seemed fate was trying to tell her so. "What's up, guys?" she asked as casually as she could manage, all the while avoiding looking directly at Freddie.

"Hi," Freddie replied, willing Carly to at least glance his way. He knew he was the one who said they shouldn't hang out anymore, but it was killing him. He'd been miserable all weekend. They had been friends for so long that it seemed part of his life was missing. Maybe his decision had been a mistake. "Mind if we join you?" he asked on impulse.

Sam glanced from Carly to Freddie and back again. When Carly didn't make a move to respond, Sam took it upon herself. She shrugged, "Sure, Fred-rina." She shook her empty cup, causing the straw to rattle. "Although it's a good thing I already finished my smoothie 'cause having to look at your face usually makes me lose my appetite." She waited for Carly to jump in and defend him.

She didn't. Instead it was Gretchen who spoke. "Awwww, Sam," she said good-naturedly. "How can you say something like that to Freddie? He is soooooo sweet and cute." She linked her arm through his and cuddled into his shoulder.

Sam feigned sticking her finger down her throat and made gagging noises. Still, Carly sat frozen to the spot. Freddie had taken the seat closest to her. _I thought he didn't want to hang out_, she said to herself. Out of the corner of her eye she could see Freddie lean over and kiss the top of Gretchen's head. Her blood began to boil as her heart lurched into her throat. Angry that he was the one who made the decision, and now, here he was, flaunting Gretchen in her face, Carly stood up abruptly, scraping the legs of her chair across the floor. She felt as if the walls were closing in on her. "Excuse me, I have to go." Without another word, she grabbed her sweater and purse and fled from the restaurant.

Gretchen stared after her in bewilderment as Freddie reached over to toy with a sugar packet on the table. Sam squinted at him with a questioning look. He didn't seem surprised by Carly's sudden departure. She really wanted to ask him what the hell that had been all about but, as much as she normally loved to do it, she didn't want to embarrass him in front of Gretchen. Mainly for Gretchen's sake. "I guess she had to get home before Spencer started wondering where she was," she improvised.

Freddie knew it was a ruse. Carly never left the house without telling Spencer where she was going, who she was going with and when she'd be back. If anything changed, she always called him. But he silently thanked Sam for not pushing the issue. "I guess so."

"I'd better get going too," Sam said, standing up and shoving her arms into the sleeves of her hoodie. She was anxious to try and catch up with Carly so she could get some answers. "See you guys later."

"That was weird," Gretchen said, turning back to Freddie. "I hope we didn't scare them off. Maybe they thought we wanted to be alone," she giggled, lacing her fingers with his.

For some reason, the giggle and gesture annoyed Freddie. Disentangling himself, he stood up, as anxious to get away as the other two had been. "I'll go place our order. What can I get you?"

Gretchen could tell Freddie was upset about something. She wondered if she'd embarrassed him in front of his friends somehow. "Oh…uhhhh…a Banana Berry Surprise is good." She heard her own voice waver slightly, so she forced a grin.

Freddie stared a moment at Gretchen. She was such a sweet and interesting girl. They had so much in common, and he kept telling himself she had to be better suited for him than Carly, right? They had fun together, and truly he enjoyed her company, but he still couldn't help the nagging feeling that something was lacking. "Great," he responded. And then because he was feeling bad about doubting their relationship, he leaned down and gave her a soft kiss on the lips. "I'll be right back."

Gretchen stared starry-eyed at his retreating back. She never saw the look of frustration that contorted his face.

*.*.*

After Freddie dropped Gretchen off at her house, he returned to his apartment. He momentarily struggled with the notion of knocking on the Shay's door before he forced himself to open his own. Carly wouldn't want to see him—would she? Not after the way he had made her cry…

The apartment was dark, indicating his mother was working another late shift. Fine by him. He wanted to be alone right now. Not bothering to turn on the lights, he made his way to his room. Kicking off his shoes, Freddie let them fall wherever they landed, making a mental note to move them to their proper cubby in his closet before his mom got home. On a sigh, he fell backwards onto the bed, staring blankly up at the ceiling. The glow-in-the-dark stars he and Carly had put on his ceiling a couple of years ago stared back down at him. He remembered the afternoon clearly. Sam had sat in his desk chair telling him only dorky nubs put stars on their ceilings. But Carly had whispered conspiratorially in his ear that she liked them, and that Sam was just jealous. She'd thought it looked cool. Before she left that afternoon, he'd stuck a single star in her jacket pocket. A star he had recently seen proudly placed on the ceiling above the center of her bed. The memory made him smile.

But his momentary happiness was short-lived. He also remembered how she had avoided even looking at him today at the Groovy Smoothie, how she had run out just because of his presence. Like she was upset. _Of course she was upset, you moron_, he thought. It was his own fault. He had told her that they shouldn't hang out together anymore. And why? Because he was a jerk whose ego got in the way. He should have never expected her to feel for him the way he feels—felt, _felt!_—for her. Why couldn't he just have let what they had be enough?

_Because you know it's not_, a voice whispered in his head. It wasn't so much that Carly had been reluctant to tell everyone about them, it was more her reluctance to admit to herself that what they'd had—what they'd shared—was something special. Something much more than just fooling around.

Although, he had to admit, fooling around with Carly had been much more satisfying than anything he'd ever imagined. Even the long kisses and stolen caresses he'd shared with Gretchen paled in contrast. He knew it wasn't fair to compare the two—and he felt guilty he even had—but he couldn't help it. Where heat and passion and urgency had lurked beneath every touch, every kiss, every sigh with Carly, warmth, ease and contentment was there with Gretchen. Not a bad thing, but not the excitement and anticipation there had been with Carly.

Freddie heard the ring tone of his Pear phone go off in his pocket. Extracting it, he looked at the caller ID. Disappointment filled his heart. "What do you want, Sam?"

"Chill, Dork-wad. I'm just calling to find out what's up with you and Carly."

He paused. Did Carly confide in her? He would have been surprised if she had considering her unwillingness to even tell Sam about them in the first place. So he played dumb. "What do you mean?"

The groan of annoyance Sam gave had him holding the phone away from his ear. "What is it with you two? Seriously—won't one of you just tell me what in the hell happened?"

"Look—I gotta go," Freddie said, anxious to end the conversation. "My mom wants me to do my second shampooing," he lied. "I forgot to do it this morning."

She didn't buy it. "Don't you hang up on me—or I'll make your life a whole lot shittier than it already is."

Shittier? Than it already was? He doubted that. It was about as shitty as you could get right now. "Sorry, Sam." He feigned static noises. "You're breaking up… krrrrrrrrrrreh… krrrrrrrrrrreh. Bad connection." He gave one last, long sound effect and pressed the disconnect button as he heard her scream, "Wait!"

Even more frustrated now, he threw his phone onto his desk.

*.*.*

Carly sat at the dinner table with Spencer and Kate. She pushed her food around her plate, not really in the mood to eat. Sam had tried calling her several times after she had left the Groovy Smoothie, but she hadn't picked up. She really just wanted to be alone right now. Alone with her thoughts. She'd already spent an hour and a half in the shower letting the water pour down on her, hoping it would wash away all the bad feelings she had inside of her. It hadn't worked the first round, and she was anxious to step back under the spray for a second one. But Spencer had insisted she come down for dinner. Getting through that was proving to be torture.

Across the table, Spencer and Kate shared a questioning look. "So, Carls," Spencer said quite cheerily, "how was the Groovy Smoothie?"

"Fine," she answered, not looking up from her meal. Her meatloaf was a mangled mess, smeared with mashed potatoes and speckled with green, slimy peas.

"Did you and Sam have fun?"

"Yes."

"Did you get your favorite, Strawberry Splat?"

"Yes."

"Did you enjoy it?"

"Yes."

"Do you know any other words besides _yes_?"

"Sure."

Spencer groaned in aggravation. "Is something wrong, Little Sis?" he asked.

Carly finally looked over at him. Concern was evident on his face. She shrugged. There was no way Spencer could ever know. "Why would you say that?"

Spencer gestured to her plate. "You haven't eaten a single bite. All you've done is mold it into…" he trailed off as he took a closer look at her dish. "Wait!" he cried, causing both Carly and Kate to jump. "Hold that thought, and don't make another move." Again, he glanced at her food and admired the way the peas were mingling with the potatoes while the meatloaf provided a good, solid base. "It's perfect," he sniffed. "Where's my shellac…?" He hopped up from the table and began a mad search for his art supplies.

Dropping her fork, Carly turned to Kate. "And you're with him why?"

Kate smiled. "I find myself asking that same question at times."

They shared a hearty laugh and, for a moment, Carly felt herself relax. A crash came from Spencer's bedroom. "That's not it," they heard him call out.

"You know, Carly," Kate began, "You can talk to me anytime you need to. I know sometimes it's easier to talk about things that are bothering you with someone who doesn't have a biased opinion."

Immediately, Carly could feel the tension building back up in her shoulders. "What do you mean? I never said anything was bothering me." Was it really that evident to everyone?

Kate didn't want to overstep any bounds, but she remembered well being a teenager and all the heartaches that went with it. "I know you didn't. But I've been there before, and I remember wishing I had someone other than my parents or good friends to talk to. Someone who wouldn't judge me, but just listen."

Carly thought for a minute. Kate made a good point. She didn't have to tell her all the details exactly—especially not that she'd had sex, or that it involved Freddie. She could just say something had happened with a guy…

But wait a minute. Would Kate relay all this to Spencer?

As if reading her mind, Kate drew and invisible "X" over her heart with her finger. "I promise anything you say to me will not be repeated to anyone—not even your brother."

For some reason, Carly truly believed her. Kate seemed genuine. And she needed that, so much. "All right." Another crash came from Spencer's room, this time followed by an, "Ow! I'm okay." Carly just rolled her eyes. "Can we go to my room, though? I don't want Spencer overhearing."

"Sure."

Kate made her way over to Spencer's door just as he was coming out. "Success," he called out, holding a can of shellac high into the air. "Found it!"

"Great, baby," Kate said, standing on her toes to give him a quick kiss on the nose. "You make your dinner sculpture while Carly and I go upstairs to…ahhhhhhhh…paint our toenails," she improvised.

Spencer ruffled her hair, pleased his girlfriend was making such an effort with his sister. She really was a keeper. "Okay. You two have fun."

"We will," they chorused, and began climbing the stairs.

Once inside Carly's bedroom, Kate took a seat on the desk chair while Carly sat cross-legged in the middle of her bed. "All right," Kate said. "Does this have something to do with a boy?"

Carly shifted uncomfortably. "Actually, yes."

Kate nodded. "It usually does. Were you seeing someone?"

Guilt ate at Carly. "Kind of…" she trailed off. She didn't really think, _No, I was only fooling around with him,_ was the appropriate answer.

Being no fool, Kate began to get a clearer picture. "I'm taking it this was a physical sort of thing?" Carly only nodded. "Are…are you pregnant?"

Shock and embarrassment hit Carly like a ton of bricks. "What? No—_No!_ It's nothing like that." Maybe this wasn't such a good idea.

Kate hid the wave of relief that washed over her. "All right," she said, remaining calm. "I just wanted to be sure. But this relationship, this physical one—it went pretty far I take it?"

Carly avoided her gaze and picked at a loose thread on her comforter. She hadn't wanted to tell Kate that it, indeed, had gone all the way, but she really needed to confide in somebody before she went crazy. "Yes." She wondered what Kate thought of her now. Suddenly she felt like a slut. She had just admitted to having had a sexual relationship with someone she wasn't even dating!

Oh god. That is exactly what she had done. Why hadn't that occurred to her before? A wave of nausea swept over her and tears threatened to fall.

Reminding herself she had been only fifteen her first time, Kate made her way over to Carly. She wrapped her arms around the younger girl's shoulders and offered soothing words of comfort as Carly buried her face in the crook of her neck and cried.

When she felt she had cried all the tears she'd had inside of her, Carly finally broke the embrace. Wiping her nose with the back of her hand, she gave Kate a watery but thankful look. "I'm sorry," she sniffed.

Kate ran a reassuring hand down Carly's back. "It's okay. You're overwhelmed. Now, do you want to go ahead and tell me what happened? It might make you feel better."

Feeling a little better already, Carly cleared her throat. "Well, there was this guy. We…" she hesitated, not wanting to give too much away or make it evident "this guy" she was speaking of was Freddie, "…we started off as friends, but one day, I don't know, something inside me—inside us—changed. We were just hanging out and somehow we wound up kissing. It began as an innocent kiss, but then we kept going." She looked at Kate, fighting back a fresh wave of tears. "We…we ended up going all the way."

"Don't be ashamed, Carly. It happened, and you can't take it back," Kate pacified. "I was only fifteen my first time too." Carly felt a small sense of reassurance in that. "Were you okay? Did he do something afterward to make you feel humiliated?"

Carly gave a wry grin. "No. The opposite in fact. He told me he lov—" she checked herself, "he cared about me," she amended.

"And did that make you feel uncomfortable?"

"Sort of. I mean—on one hand, it made me feel like what we did had been right. I don't regret it," she said with conviction, "But on the other hand, I don't know. I really wasn't ready for a relationship with this person."

"But you kept up the physical part of it?"

Carly nodded. "Does that make me, you know," she leaned in conspiratorially, "a slut?" she finished on a whisper, the word too awful to utter aloud. Nervous butterflies flitted through her already unsettled stomach.

Kate's heart ached for Spencer's little sister. "No, no, Sweetheart. It makes you human." She took Carly's hand in her own. "And while I want to tell you it may not have been the best decision, I know what it's like to be young and discovering the rush a physical relationship can give." She gave it a squeeze. "Are you looking to get out of this relationship now, or what happened? Are you still…um…_seeing_ him?"

Carly could feel a blush rise high on her cheeks. "No, no, we are no longer seeing each other. He…he wanted more and I was afraid to give it to him." She stood up to pace the room restlessly. "And not 'more' in a physical sense, but 'more' in an emotional sense." Wringing her hands she stopped and turned to Kate. "I was afraid if I let myself feel too much for him, we would both end up getting hurt. I was trying to protect us—to protect our friendship."

"Did you tell him this?"

"I couldn't. He wouldn't have understood."

"Why do you say that?"

Carly looked down and shuffled her feet. "In his eyes we were perfect, we were meant to be together. But I've seen how many of Spencer's relationships have failed, and I can't help but worry that mine might be doomed as well." Suddenly realizing what she had just said, and who she had said it to, her head shot up. "Oh, god. I am so sorry, Kate. I didn't mean…you and Spencer…it's just…" She couldn't believe how rude and inconsiderate she'd been. Here was this woman, trying to be nice, letting her pour her out, and she had gone and insulted her. What a nub!

But Kate gave a wave of dismissal. "Don't apologize. I am well aware that Spencer dated other girls before me, and that most of those relationships ended pretty badly." She gave Carly a wink and saw the girl's shoulders loosen up slightly. "But those relationships aren't us—those girls aren't me. And while we can't predict what will happen, or go back and change things, we can always enjoy what we have for the moment, and not worry about the 'what ifs' and the 'should haves'. When we do that—we end up missing out on what is right in front of us."

Taking a moment, Carly thought it over. She let the words Kate had just said sink in. "Wow—I guess I never really thought of it that way. I had been so busy worrying about what could happen between me and Freddie, and how if we made it official we were a couple, we might ruin our friendship, that I just took what we had for granted. I guess my reluctance to see it ruined it for us in the end anyway." Suddenly Carly noticed Kate looking at her funny. "What?"

"Did…did you just say Freddie?"

Carly gulped audibly. Did she? Holy crap, she totally had! "Uh…yes…" she answered hesitantly.

"The boy across the hall? Your _iCarly_ tech?" Since Kate had only been around for a couple of months, after everything had happened between Carly and Freddie, she really only saw him when he came over to do things for the show. Spencer had mentioned Freddie and Carly, along with Sam, were best friends, and that Freddie used to come around a lot more, everyday in fact, but he figured Freddie was now otherwise occupied spending more time with his…girlfriend? "The one who brings his _girlfriend_ over during rehearsals and tapings?"

Wishing the floor would open up and swallow her, Carly gave another feeble, "Yes."

Kate pinched the bridge of her nose, things beginning to fall into place. "So you and Freddie slept together, he wanted to be a couple, you were too scared to agree, so you guys ended up going your own separate ways. Am I right so far?"

Carly nodded.

"So now things are awkward between you two, especially seeing as he now has a girlfriend." Again, Carly nodded her agreement. "I'm guessing there might be a bit of jealousy on your part." Carly crossed her arms across her chest and rolled her eyes but didn't deny it. "That must be really difficult on you since he was your friend before anything else."

Amazed Kate seemed so understanding and so calm about all of this gave Carly hope. "It is. That's what's hurting the most right now. He…he told me he didn't think we should hang out together anymore, that it was just too hard. And I miss him." Carly again took a seat next to Kate. "What should I do?"

"I think you should talk to him." At the look of horror on Carly's face, Kate chuckled softly. "He needs to know how you really feel, Carly. That your friendship is what mattered—what_ still_ matters."

Carly felt her heart rate go into panic tempo. "What if he doesn't want to listen?"

"You'll never know unless you try."

On impulse, Carly threw her arms around Kate. "Thank you," she whispered. She didn't think there were any other words to let Kate know how much this talk had meant to her, how much better she felt. The shower that had been calling her name earlier had stopped. Kate was wise beyond her years, and though her advice all seemed so simple, she had a way of making Carly feel she could accomplish anything. Carly said a silent prayer that she truly was the one for Spencer. He deserved her.

Kate returned the embrace. "You're welcome."

Pulling back, Carly smoothed a stray strand of hair behind her ear. "I guess we'd better get back downstairs before Spencer wonders what happened to us."

"Wait!" Kate said, freezing mid-stride to the door. "We need to change up our toes at least a little, or he might notice we weren't up here painting them."

"Good point," Carly agreed. She went to her desk and began looking through the bottles of polish. "Do you have polish on now?"

"Yes."

"What color?"

"Red."

Carly grabbed a bottle of white polish from the collection. "Here," she said, tossing Kate the bottle. "Paint some polka dots on your toes, and he'll be none the wiser. Plus, it'll take only a minute to do it."

"Good thinking," Kate said, her face lighting up with delight. "Sneaky, sneaky. I like it."

Carly grabbed a bottle of blue and began painting lines across the pink polish she already had on her toes. "Me too," she giggled.

Three minutes later, they were making there way back downstairs with Kate leading the way, each walking precariously on their heels to keep from smudging their handiwork. As they made it to the landing, Carly glanced down at her toes to make sure no damage had been done. "When do you think I should try and talk to him," she asked Kate's back.

Kate stopped abruptly causing Carly to bump into her. "No time like the present," she heard Kate say before descending the final stair. It was then Carly looked up, her eyes locking on to a warm, brown pair across the room.

"Hi."

Her hand flew to her heart. "Freddie, what are you doing here?"

* * *

**END NOTES:** All right peeps. Thanks for reading! You rock!


	4. Chapter Three

**A/N:** Knock, knock. Anyone there?

I'm not going to make any excuses—I can only apologize. I haven't abandoned the story—just lost my mojo for awhile. It's seems to be back and let's hope it stays that way.

For all my loyal followers, and for you new readers out there, this one's for you. I hope you enjoy.

**WARNING! **This chapter contains explicit depictions of sexual acts and language. If you are offended by either, or are underage, please do not read further.

* * *

**CHAPTER THREE**

Freddie lay propped up against the headboard of his bed as he idly flipped through the channels on his television. He was feeling pretty good after the talk he and Carly'd had earlier that evening. He'd been worried it would have been awkward and difficult, but it was quite the opposite. They each said what needed to be said and came to the best conclusion.

Their friendship was not worth their hormones.

*.*.*

_Earlier that evening…_

"Freddie, what are you doing here?" Carly asked, her hand curling around her shirt, clutching to it desperately while trying to remain in control.

He didn't realize it, but his eyes were totally locked on Carly—nearly forgetting there were two other people in the room. "I need to talk to you."

"Oh, sure," she said, looking frantically at Kate who just gave an encouraging nod of her head. "You want to go up to the studio?" He only nodded his response. She turned on her heel and headed back up the stairs. Freddie followed.

Kate watched them go, saying a silent prayer they could work something out. She felt Spencer come up beside her, draping his arm across her shoulder. "Well, that was kind of strange," he said, his tone riddled with confusion.

Kate merely gave a casual shrug. "Teenagers," she said simply.

Up in the studio, Carly gestured toward the bean bags. "Should we sit down?" Her heart was pounding in her chest.

Freddie shrugged. "Sure."

They each took a seat. Awkward silence followed. Finally, they spoke at the same time.

"Carly—"

"Freddie—"

"You go first," he said.

"No, no. You came here to talk to me—I'm sorry. You go first."

Freddie looked down at his hands. "Okay," he said before, again, falling silent, his brain rattling, trying to decide what to say. He had come over on impulse. He'd been staring at his ceiling for what seemed hours. And all he kept thinking was he needed to make up with Carly. He couldn't imagine his life without her. "I came over to apologize." He looked up and into her eyes. "I don't want to stop being friends, Carly. I was just mad at what had happened. Not at you—but at myself, and the situation." He shifted forward and took her hand in his. "I should never have pushed you in the first place."

A wave of relief washed over her—he still wanted to be friends! But she knew that their recent actions were not without consequence, and not entirely Freddie's fault. "Freddie, what happened in the kitchen on Friday—"

"I'm not just talking about Friday," he interrupted. "I'm talking about trying to make you feel for me the way I fee—" he cleared his throat, "f-felt for you."

Felt? Did that mean his feelings for her had changed? An uncomfortable knot formed in her stomach, but she chose to ignore it. "Don't blame yourself, Freddie. I'm sorry too. I should have told you how I…um…felt about you in the first place and given you answers when you asked for them."

"What do you mean?"

She took a deep breath. "You asked me why I was scared of us, of a relationship." God, she hoped Kate was right. She was going to lay it all on the line here. "I was scared of losing you."

"Wait—I'm confused. How would you be losing me if we were in a relationship?"

Carly shook her head. "I know it sounds silly, but I just kept thinking—what if something were to happen down the line and we broke up? Then not only would I be losing my boyfriend, but I would be losing a best friend." She looked him in the eye. "I didn't know if that was a risk I was willing to take. I care about you. I need you in my life." She'd done it. Suddenly she felt a weight had been lifted from her shoulders.

Freddie toyed with her fingers. "I wasn't going anywhere. I need you too. These past couple of days have been so hard to get through. It was stupid of me to punish you just because I…" he glanced down at their joined hands and hesitated, "…I still get feelings for you every now and then."

Carly blushed. While she was relieved to know he was feeling just as lost and confused at times as she, she knew that they needed to focus on their friendship and not do anything more that could potentially ruin it. As much as it pained her… "I still get feelings for you too." Freddie opened his mouth to speak but Carly shook her head and went on. "But I think it's kind of hard not to—we've been through a lot together, Freddie. It…it doesn't necessarily mean we need to act on them."

He knew she was right. Part of him, a big part, didn't want her to be right—to be that reasonable. But he knew it was for the best.

So they had come to the decision that they would remain friends and nothing more. Letting their bodies control their actions was not an option—nor was it worth risking their friendship over. It also wasn't fair to Gretchen, Freddie had pointed out. And though he knew it had pained Carly to hear it, he really did care for Gretchen and didn't want her to get hurt in the process either. She was special to him—someone who shared his interests and doted on him in a way Carly never had.

*.*.*

Freddie continued to flip through the channels until he came across a documentary on elephants. He tossed the clicker aside. Emotionally drained, he gave a large yawn, shifting lower down onto his pillow. He could feel his eyes beginning to droop. He must have been more tired than he thought. Sleep was sneaking up on him quickly. He felt himself begin to doze off.

Moments later, a soft knocking roused him. Quite groggy, he fought through the hazy fog of slumber to focus. The sound was coming from his door. "Come in," he called, his voice husky with sleep.

He was surprised when Carly entered. "Hi," she said softly.

As he sat up, he could only stare at her, confused. He had left her apartment maybe thirty minutes earlier and, for whatever reason, she had changed her clothes. She was wearing a very thin, very tight and very skimpy tank top in a vibrant shade of red. She had paired it with her flouncy, black tiered skirt sprinkled with tiny, multi-colored flowers. The skirt was short, and one of his favorite items of clothing she owned. He knew she normally paired it with tights. But not tonight. Instead, her legs were bare, and feet adorned with some insanely high platform, black patent-leather, cage-style sandals. Fuck-me shoes. It was…hot. That was about the only word he could think of to describe it. He shifted uncomfortably, trying desperately to stop the inappropriate thoughts from forming. He failed miserably. "Carly, what are you doing here? Y-you look like you're heading out or something." That was about the only explanation he could think of for her dress.

She gave an easy laugh. "No, Silly. I came over to see you."

"But what's…what's with the outfit?" he asked.

"What? You don't like it?" There was a playful edge to her voice as she smoothed her skirt. That little action directed his attention to the smooth skin of her thighs. "You always told me you liked this skirt."

"I-I-I do," he stuttered. Then, quite literally shaking his head to regain his focus, he fixed his gaze on her face. "I'm sorry—why are you here again?"

She smiled but rolled her eyes. "I told you," she began, stepping further into his room and closing the door behind her, "I came to see you."

"Carly, my mom doesn't like the door closed when I have a girl in here." He had to be rational. Firm and rational. God, the blood was pumping through his veins like fire.

Her giggle only intensified his desire. "And just how many girls do you have in here?" she teased lightly as she moved closer to his seat on the bed.

Feeling a bit of his resolve breaking, he smiled at her. "A few."

"Gretchen?"

The smile on his face immediately dissolved. "Yes," he responded, quite stiffly. He wasn't sure why the mention of his girlfriend suddenly angered him instead of making him feel sentimental. Sensing where this was going, he stood up and gestured toward the door. "I'm not sure why you're here, but I think you need to leave."

"No need to be rude," she said in an admonishing tone. She leaned over to adjust the strap of her sandal. Freddie watched in fascination as her fingers skimmed lightly up the creamy flesh of her own thigh as she drew her hands back up. "I've been thinking," she paused as she began to wander around the room restlessly, "about our talk. I don't know if we made the right decision."

He watched as she paced, shoving his hands in his pockets. It was obvious she wasn't wearing a bra—her nipples straining against the flimsy material of her top, her small breasts bouncing slightly with each step. Annoyed he couldn't force himself to tear his eyes away from her, he bit back a curse. "You seemed fine with it a while ago. What made you change your mind?"

Fate would have it that at that precise moment she was standing right beside him. She took a step towards him and held his gaze. "I want you."

Even though his body was pounding with need, he forced himself to keep a cool head. "You had your chance. I'm with Gretchen now."

"C'mon, Freddie," Carly begged, trailing her fingers up his chest to cup his cheek. "Just kiss me."

He shook her hand off. "I can't. We promised no more of this." But he could feel he was losing the battle. When she pressed her body into his, he knew had. Her lips hovered so close to his.

"Tell me you don't want me, Freddie. Tell me, and I'll leave," she whispered hot against his mouth as her fingers toyed with the collar of his shirt.

"I don't want you." But even as he said it, his lips crushed down on hers.

The kiss was frantic and full of need. His hands shot out to delve into her hair, not-so-gently gathering fistfuls of the silky strands. He heard her moan—it fueled his desire. In an instant, he had her laid out beneath him on his bed, his body pressing heavily down on hers. He could feel her breasts crushed between them, and his tongue plunged into her mouth to find hers waiting impatiently.

Too hell with their promise. At that moment, all Freddie could think about was how much he wanted Carly, how much he wanted to be with her again, how much he needed to fill himself with her once more.

It had been too long since their first time—their only time. But as his hand found her breast, and her familiar moan filled the room, he knew it wasn't forgotten. The subtle swell of her fit perfectly in the palm of his hand, just the way he'd remembered. He practically growled as she nipped lightly at his bottom lip in a playful manner. In retaliation, he began nuzzling the ticklish spot behind her ears as his fingers worked to pull her top from the high waistband of her skirt. She giggled and squirmed beneath him, her own fingers seeking out the hem of his shirt to gently tug it upward, and feel his warmed flesh beneath.

The two fought and struggled against one another to quickly shed their tops. Freddie sat back on his heels to disentangle his head from the shirt he'd been wearing. As he tossed it to the floor, he watched as Carly sat up and removed her own shirt, exposing her naked breasts and perfect rosy nipples. He couldn't tear his eyes away from the tiny pink buds. Reaching out, he ran the pad of his thumb lightly over one, marveling in the distinct, puckered feel of it against the sensitive skin on his finger. She gave a sigh and dropped her head back in complete pleasure. He felt himself harden even more. Leaning forward he kissed her throat, drawing in her scent, trailing kisses down, down, down…

Blood pounded in his ears, through his veins, his loins. Slowly he drew one taut peak between his lips, and then the other. As she whimpered, he slowly slid one hand up her skirt gently circling the smooth skin of her thighs with his fingers until he reached the edge of her panties. He ran his knuckles ever so lightly over the increasingly damp cotton. He slipped a finger beneath the material and slid it easily over the wet folds of skin between her legs, parting them, and dipping his finger inside. He felt her clench around him as he pushed in a second finger. "Mmmmmmm…Freddie," she murmured over and over again to the rhythm of his hand as he glided in and out of her wetness.

He watched, mesmerized, as her eyelashes fluttered against her cheek, and she bit her lip on a moan. "Freddie?" she said lazily.

"Yeah?" His heart was pounding in his chest.

"Make love to me…" she trailed off, gently pushing his hand from between her thighs and hooking her thumbs in her panties. She lifted off the bed slightly, slipping the soaking cotton over her bottom before lifting her legs in the air and drawing her underwear off in one, swift, sexy motion.

He could only stare as she sat up and tucked her legs to the side modestly. She was so exposed even though she was still wearing her skirt and those damn fuck-me shoes. "Freddie," he heard her giggle, bringing him back to the moment. "Aren't you going to take your pants off?"

"I…uh…" he stammered, flustered as his hands tried unsuccessfully to undo his belt.

"Let me help," she purred as she knelt before him, her hands expertly working his belt through the buckle. She made quick work unbuttoning and unzipping his pants. When she slipped her hand in and beneath his boxers, he could have sworn his eyes crossed. God, how he missed her touch. She used long, even strokes up and down his length. "Ooh…I've missed this," she said, echoing his thoughts, her breath was hot and damp against his lips. As she increased the speed of her hand, he groaned and leaned forward, capturing her mouth with his own, his hand again finding its way beneath her skirt.

The two teased each other with their hands and fingers. Moans were swallowed by open-mouthed kisses, and damp flesh slipped against damp flesh. "Now, Freddie, please!" Carly begged, tearing her mouth from his. His pulse roaring in his ears, he not-so-gently fell atop her onto the mattress. "Oomph," she exhaled against his mouth, struggling to help him shimmy his boxers down his legs. Balancing his weight on his forearms, he pushed himself up to look her in the eyes as he positioned himself at her entrance.

"You sure about this?" he asked.

"Yes, Freddie," she said on a moan, and lifted her hips in invitation.

He felt slightly rushed, especially since they hadn't done it since that first time months ago. But he wasn't about to turn her down. "I just want to make sure—"

"Freddie!" she said in an exasperated tone.

"I know, I know. But—"

Before he could finish his sentence, Carly shoved him over to the side, knocking him back on the mattress. In an instant she was astride his hips, her wetness hovering over his rigid member. Slowly she lifted her skirt, treating him to an unobscured view of her creamy thighs and neatly trimmed pubic hair. "What are you doing?" he managed to croak, his throat suddenly dry.

"This," she murmured. Carly kept hold of her skirt with one hand while taking a hold of his erection in the other. He watched as she gripped his shaft and moved it upwards toward her damp center. Slowly she slid down onto him.

God, she was so slick.

He bit his lip hard to keep the moan that he felt all the way in his gut from escaping. He watched as she gradually reared up until he was almost all the way out before she leisurely slid back down. She repeated the motion over and over. His member was slowly becoming coated in her wetness, and it glistened as she continued to glide up and down him in a torturous manner. "Carly," he panted.

"Shhhhh," she whispered. She gathered her skirt against her elbow and let her fingers drift down. He stared in fascination as she parted her lips, exposing her swollen clitoris. Skillfully she began to tease herself by rubbing her middle finger against the small bundle of nerves. "Mmmmmmm…" she purred.

It was the most erotic thing he had ever seen; Carly pleasuring herself—and letting him watch. He groaned his appreciation—reaching out to grip her hips and increase the pace. He began pumping into her hard and fast.

Carly became frantic atop him. She groaned and begged and writhed as she called out his name like a mantra. "Yes, Freddie. Yes! Keep going. Oh…yeah…yeah…Freddie…Freddie…my Freddie…"

He could feel the pleasure building—each time she said his name, his gut tightened a little bit harder until, with a scream of pure ecstasy, she began to quake around him.

On a final moan, Freddie felt himself falling over the edge with her. Falling…and falling…and falling…

_THUMP!_

He groaned as he struggled to open his eyes. The blurry outlines around him suddenly came into focus. He discovered he was lying on the floor beside his bed.

Alone?

He struggled to sit up. The TV across the room was giving the room an eerie glow, the low volume murmuring in the background. He must have fallen asleep.

Wait a minute—Carly! Where was she?

Panic had him jumping up. It was then he noticed he was still fully clothed. It had all been a dream. But it had seemed so real. He could have sworn they had just…

_Oh geez_, he rolled his eyes as he became all too aware of the sticky, wet sensation in his boxers. He couldn't believe that had just happened. He hadn't had a dream like that for months. In fact, not since before he and Carly had first… He groaned out loud. It was best not to think about that.

Muttering angrily to himself, he grabbed a fresh pair of boxers from his dresser and scooped his pajama bottoms off the end of his bed where his mother had laid them out that afternoon before she'd left for her shift at work. Why would he have had a dream like that after the nice talk he and Carly'd had? They'd each made it quite clear that any feelings they had were just left over from what had happened in the past. He was happy with Gretchen, he cared about her. And besides, his and Carly's friendship was what was most important. They didn't want to complicate it by acting on any hormonal urges.

Freddie made his way to the shower, turning the water on as hot as possible, trying to wash away any remnants of his dream. But it was futile. The images were burned into his brain. Guilt ate at him. He should have been dreaming about Gretchen, not Carly.

But, oh, god, what a dream it had been. Everything about the dream had seemed so real—her feel, her scent, her…taste. The moment he had slipped into her had been like coming home. She'd fit so hot and tight around him…

His hand unconsciously wandered down to his already growing erection. Being inside Carly had been the most amazing moment of his life. Even if he could only ever relive it through a dream…

As his hand instinctively began stroking his hardness, he came crashing back to reality. _Damnit! _he cursed himself, pulling his hand away and immediately switching the water faucet to cold. He bit back a hiss as the icy spray hit him like a slap.

This whole not listening to the hormones thing—not working out too well. Freddie didn't know what he was going to do. He had to face Carly the next day at rehearsal. Could he really pretend this dream never happened?

_I can and I will_, he thought with newfound resolve. He'd done it all those years his crush for her had been one-sided. Why should it be any different now? He turned the water back to warm and began shampooing his hair with a renewed gusto. All he had to do was focus on Gretchen. Any thoughts about Carly, he would just disregard. This dream wasn't a setback—it was just a test. A test he knew he passed.

He blatantly ignored the small voice in the back of his mind that told him otherwise…

*.*.*

Carly stood in front of her closet Thursday morning trying to decide what to wear. She flipped through the hangers not really seeing anything. Her mind was on Freddie. Their talk a few days prior had been needed. Things between them seemed to be back to normal—sitting with each other on the bus ride to school, eating lunch together (with Gretchen though, of course), _iCarly_ rehearsals... She was so glad that Kate had convinced her to tell him how she felt, yet, she still felt an emptiness inside.

_It's because he's still with Gretchen and not you_, a voice inside her head whispered.

"Oh stop it!" she scolded out loud.

"Stop what?"

Carly nearly jumped out of her skin at the voice behind her. She whirled around to face Sam. "Nothing," she said, pulling her robe closed tighter to her throat. "What are you doing sneaking up on me like that?"

"I wasn't sneaking," Sam said, a look of confusion on her face. "I just figured I'd catch a ride to school with you and Freddie today. You okay?"

"Yeah. Fine. Why?" Carly knew she sounded guilty.

Sam was quiet a moment before she spoke. These past few days, Carly had begun acting like her old self again. So much so that Sam had brushed aside the whole incident at the Groovy Smoothie. But now it seemed she caught Carly back in a moment of preoccupation and distress.

"Honestly, Carls, I was going to drop it but," Sam sighed, "I already told you you've been acting all weird lately. You ran out of the Groovy Smoothie the other night and still haven't given me an explanation as to why—"

"I did too!" Carly interrupted.

Sam rolled her eyes. "Yeah—you mean your claim that Spencer 'texted' you telling you to come home right away?" Carly gave a feeble nod. "C'mon—you never took your phone out the entire time we were there."

Carly just shrugged. While she still wanted to tell Sam what had happened, she was also nervous about how Sam would react. "Look—I just wanted to get out of there, all right? I was feeling, claustrophobic. There were too many people there."

"People like Freddie and Gretchen?"

Sam was smart—Carly knew that. "Maybe," was all she offered, though.

"You know, you never finished telling me what happened between you and Freddie," Sam probed. Curiosity was eating her alive. She was dying to know what had happened between her two best friends.

"Oh that?" Carly heard herself feigning a carefree tone, "That was nothing." She went back to searching through her closet for something to wear. "We had a silly argument but it's done and over now. We talked it out." Now that her and Freddie had made their amends, there was no use in telling Sam _all_ the details right?

"Whatever," Sam said, visibly annoyed. "I'm gonna go see if Spencer will make me an omelet before we leave. Hurry up and get dressed, will ya?" With that, she turned on her heel and stomped down the hall.

Carly pinched the bridge of her nose. She hadn't meant to upset Sam. She wasn't ready to tell her best friend everything. Not just yet. Sam would stew and sulk for a while—probably only until Spencer got an omelet into her.

Glancing back at the hangers in front of her, Carly's eyes finally spied the perfect item of clothing to wear. She reached in and pulled the flirty, black skirt from the rod. It was short and girly—the tiers sprinkled merrily with teeny, tiny flowers. Just the pick-me-up she needed.

She couldn't help it if it also happened to be a favorite of Freddie's now could she?

* * *

**END NOTES:** I truly hope no one was disappointed with this chapter—especially after the insanely long wait. Love to you all!


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